dogs Archives - Page 2 of 3

Subscription postcards: Bats, birds, and gravity

March 20, 2013 by campbell Leave a Comment

Postcard collage: A bat flying in front of Crater Lake at sunset, with the text "Amazing Technicolor Brain"

Message on postcard:
Kevin — Today I was walking along the beach and I found a really long, rubbery plant with an air-filled bladder at one end. What is this thing? Is it kelp? I don’t think it’s kelp. I don’t know very much about ocean plant life, but I know this thing is interesting and disgusting. I think the whole plant is hollow. It’s like a hollow, rubbery rope. When the mutant apocalypse hits we’ll rename things after their new, post-industrial uses. These weird sea plants will one day be known as quick-rot hoses. But I want to know what we call them today.

My dog Skillet and a weird sea plant. — Skillet sits next to a quick-rot hose on Netarts Spit while staring at the ocean.

Postcard collage: A bird of prey with outstretched wings is positioned behind an "Iron Range" sign from Minnesota. A word balloon from the bird says "Come in".

Message on postcard:
Beth — Cape Lookout State Park is a popular spot for paragliders. Today I saw about ten of them flying around above the beach. They tend not to venture too far from shore. I’m guessing that one paraglider lost at sea was enough to teach everyone else a valuable lesson. People who can fall out of the sky don’t like learning the hard way.

Postcard collage: Tourists appear to lean to the side in a wooden shack called the "Gravity House". Text says "'Publish or perish' has become an axiom affecting the destinies of many scientists."

Message on postcard:
Hey Kathleen — Today I ate marionberry pie for breakfast. It’s my new favorite thing to do while camping. I didn’t know the difference between a marionberry and a blackberry, so I had to look it up. Turns out that the marionberry is a specific blackberry cultivar developed by the USDA at Oregon State University. In 2009 Oregon was going to name the marionberry our official state berry, but a farmer who grew a different cultivar objected and the issue was dropped.

The fracas generated a great headline: “Push to name a state berry starts rhubarb”. The story had a fantastic quote from Marion County’s state legislator: “I am not going to bat over internal disputes in the berry community.”

Learn more: http://tinyurl.com/berry-fracas

Subscription postcards: Big strides, greywater reservoirs, and badgers

January 24, 2013 by campbell Leave a Comment

Postcard collage: A giant foot about to step across the Mississippi headwaters. Text: Award for stepping across the Mississippi River, Lake Itasca, Minnesota. — Hello Andrew! Here’s a postcard I picked up last summer at Lake Itasca, home to the Mississippi headwaters. Itasca is a made-up word, derived from the phrase *veritas caput*, Latin for “true head”. Apparently the actual headwaters of the Mississippi were a matter of some contention. While there I strode across the Mississippi with my dog Skillet. I was warned to be careful; if he peed in the river near the source he could flood New Orleans. A man and his dog, flirting with danger.

Postcard collage: A big sign that says "DAM" in front of a backlit sequoia. — Hello Mollie! I hope you like this postcard — I made it using a dam-awareness brochure I picked up in Minnesota last summer. Out here in the west all the reservoirs seem kind of low. I have been doing my part to help: I save all my used dishwater, and once a week I drive up to the mountains to dump it in the nearest reservoir. I am joining thousands of other planet-loving Americans in my quest for a greener earth. It must be working — when I turn on the faucet, the water comes out soapy and full of potato peels.

Postcard collage: A man in running clothes next to a tent and pine trees, with the text "All Natural". Behind him is a badger. — Hello Kathleen! Here is a postcard that I made last summer while I was in the Midwest. After I made this postcard I saw a badger in Iowa’s Loess Hills — another great case of life imitating art. For such fierce creatures, badgers sure are cute as the dickens.

-Mike

ps: Did you know Wikipedia has an article titled “List of Fictional Badgers”?

Subscription postcards: Rock formations, primary functions, and life questions

November 20, 2012 by campbell Leave a Comment

Postcard with skeptical interpretation of "The Poodle" rock formation at Bryce Canyon National Park. — Jennifer and Anthony — This is a postcard I picked up back in April on my first trip through Utah. All the rock formations there have imaginative names that supposedly describe their appearance. This one is supposed to be a poodle. I don’t see it, but it’s probably good that someone with more imagination named these things. If it had been left up to me, every single formation would be named “Yet Another Rock Thing”.

Postcard with a bridge, a ship, the mightiest wind, and finding your primary function. — Hello Sacha! Right now my dog Skillet is chewing on a bone. He’s really getting into it, and it’s not even a real bone, it’s one of the fake ones from the store. But he still has this intense “I am fulfilling my primary function” thing going on. He seems really content. I should write a self-help book for the hyper-analytical called *Finding Your Primary Function*.

Postcard of pondering man: Man has a greater brain capacity, and can reason. — Hey Steve — Do you ever wonder this? I wonder this all the time. “What am I doing with my life?” I ask myself. And if only I was better at lying to myself, this question could get me *really* psyched up. In fact, I think that is probably how Dog the Bounty Hunter got so successful. Every morning he woke up believing he was a bounty hunter, and then he was one.

I am a bounty hunter. I am a bounty hunter. I am a bounty hunter.

Art by mail: Outdoor adventures

November 14, 2012 by campbell Leave a Comment

Message on postcard:
Hello Finn! Greetings from Oregon. I’ve been traveling the country all year with my dogs, and I’m finally finishing my trip out here in eastern Oregon. There are huge mountains, deep canyons, and flat deserts. It’s a neat place. I’m visiting it in a Vanagon, a Volkswagen van like the one your dad has. Your dad asked me to send you a postcard from my travels. So I thought I’d tell you about my dogs. Their names are Skillet and Kaida, and they’re outside the van right now, soaking up the heat in the very flat Alvord Desert. The reason it’s so flat is because it’s the bottom of an old lake that dried up. It’s a really neat place!

Skillet and Kaida both like to travel. We’ve been on the road since April of this year, and at first I was kind of nervous because Skillet gets carsick easily. But Skillet is a smart dog, and it didn’t take him long to learn that he wouldn’t get sick if he kept looking out the window. He and Kaida both like sitting in the front passenger seat. Fortunately, Kaida is very easygoing, and she lets Skillet sit right on top of her while she’s curled up and sleeping! Skillet is only two years old and pretty energetic, but Kaida is almost seven, and she’s been with me through thick and thin. She spent a month in Iowa living the easy life with my family while Skillet and I visited the Great Lakes, and that’s the longest we’ve ever been apart.

The dogs and I have had a lot of adventures this year. In June, Skillet and I visited the source of the Mississippi River, where it’s just a stream, and we waded across it. In July, Kaida saved me from a wild animal attack. My dogs are the best!