Fully Psyched

A conglomeration of things

A conglomeration of things

  • Original Content
    • Art / writing / everything
    • Postcards and letters
    • Collages and drawings
    • Writing
    • Sketchbook
    • Project index
  • Projects
    • Project index
    • Greetings from the Back of My Van
    • Star Wars Camping Adventures
    • Great Big Letter
    • Public comments on NPS DO-21
    • Interviews at the Charles M. Schulz Museum
    • Iowa Field Recordings, June 2010
    • View all projects
  • View all posts
  • Request a postcard
  • About

Art by mail: A dazzling wasteland

August 31, 2012 by campbell Leave a Comment

Postcard collage of Great Salt Lake Desert, woman, and fish

Message on postcard:
Hi Tara! When asked to choose between a kid-friendly and non-kid-friendly postcard, you specified, “Vulgarity, please.” So I am gosh dang happy to bring you the most foolin’-est vulgar postcard my pottymouth mind can muster.

My Aunt Christine keeps telling me, “Sweetie, you should use less profanity when you write! You’re too good a writer to use such a lazy trick.” And I’m like, “Dang it, yo! I don’t think you appreciate how flippin’ rough life can be, and how my unique blend of personal experiences has contributed to my one-of-a-kind street flavor. I love you, but you need to respect my fudging work, please.” And the truly sad thing is that when she steps with this bull hooey, she doesn’t even realize she’s instigating the kind of soul-wrenching internecine conflict that legitimates my casual use of profanity.

Anyhowski, take a peep at that map to the right and sit back while I regale you with tales of my fantastic voyage across the American West. It was hot as the blazes of heck the day I drove through the southern reaches of the Great Salt Lake Desert on U.S. Highway 50. Western Utah is home to a few rough-and-tumble street gangs, including the Wasatch Blood Donors and the much-feared Salt Lake Safety Razors. Tensions were running high during my visit, and earlier that week the two gangs had exchanged a particularly cutting volley of letters to the editor. If I broke down in the desert I would have to rely on my own wits and survival skills for up to forty-five minutes, which is how long the sheriff told me I could expect to wait before encountering a random act of good samaritanism.

“Shucks, sir,” I said to the sheriff, “I don’t think you realize what a bleedin’ tough son-of-a-good-mother you’re talkin’ to.”

But the sheriff was unimpressed. “Don’t be a silly fool, son. Stay the night in my guest cottage and you can chow down at the senior center spaghetti dinner tonight. My treat.”

Well, I knew better safe than sorry, so I looked him square in the eye and took him up on his hospitality. I learned a valuable lesson that day, I assume.

Map of Great Salt Lake Desert
The above-mentioned map of the Great Salt Lake Desert.

 

Filed Under: Collage, Greetings from the Back of My Van, Postcards, Writing Tagged With: art, collage, GFTBOMV giant-sized postcards, postcards, travel, Utah

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Project updates!

Want to get updates on new projects posted here? Sign up below. I won't share your email address, and I won't spam your inbox with junk.

Make your mailbox fabulous

Be the envy of your friends. Request a postcard.

Latest sketchbook

A postcard collage of an old woman wearing sunglasses and saying "lentils lentils lentils lentils lentils"

Lentils lentils lentils lentils lentils lentils

Latest photo

A photo of the Grand Canon on a sunny day, with a tilt-shift effect applied in post-processing.

Some desktop-wallpaper-sized photos from my last trip to Grand Canyon.

Recent projects

Illustration of Jar Jar sitting in front of a gas station.

Star Wars Camping Adventures: Episode One

photo of Grand Canyon

Public comments on proposed revisions to NPS Director’s Order 21

Photograph of blue VW Vanagon in the desert, with the phrase Greetings from the Back of My Van overlaid above it

Greetings from the Back of My Van

Categories

  • Everything except sketchbook and photography
  • Art
    • Collage
    • Drawing
  • Correspondence
    • Letters
    • Postcards
  • Great Big Letter
  • Greetings from the Back of My Van
  • Projects
  • Technical
  • Writing
  • Sketchbook
  • Photography
  • Projects

    • Project index
    • Star Wars Camping Adventures
    • Public comments on NPS DO-21
    • Greetings from the Back of My Van
    • Great big letter
    • Interviews at the Charles M. Schulz Museum
    • Iowa Field Recordings, June 2010

    Absolute basics

    • About
    • Contact
    • Request a postcard

    Elsewhere

    • Someday I'll be on Instagram
    • Right now I'm on Facebook
    • In 2006 I was on Flickr

    Copyright © 2021 · Magazine Pro Theme on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in